Capitol X

Reagan

2004-06-06T03:12:00.000-04:00

Ronny Ray-gun is dead, and the Republicans are working themselves into a lather about it all. For what it's worth, I thought he was cute.

Saturday Morning Ritual

2004-06-05T11:18:00.000-04:00

Like most other Saturday mornings, I woke up this Saturday with no fucking clue where I wuz or whose bed I was in. All I knew was that my hair was all over the place, my lips were sore and my cooze even moreso. I knocked back so many Bacardi's last night, I don't even remember exactly when I blacked out -- just that I did. My gentleman caller had to catch a plane back out to his constituents, so I've got the run of his place today. Wonder if he's got a spare set of boxers? Because I can't find my thong.

Who's Queer?

2004-06-04T08:25:00.000-04:00

The Democrats are lousy with gays and lesbians (I like the lipstick ones myself), but the carpet munchers have to sit at the back of the Republican bus. The Washington Blade is on the Bushies trying to find out who in the campaign has a limp wrist. ...and that picture of Ken Mehlman is really prominent.

On my way...

2004-06-04T03:05:00.000-04:00

Just got this txt message:

Cum over. Go commando.

Fave Sex Act

2004-06-04T01:05:00.000-04:00

I've heard that more than one Hill staffer has given a rimjob in exchange for a cushy ass-ignment, but a cock between the lips (thanx botox!) gets my rocket's red glare like nothin else. I'll tell you this much - I don't swallow for any less than a month's salary...

Red Line, Red Ass

2004-06-02T14:21:00.000-04:00

Have you joined the “mile under” club yet? I confess to doling out a handjob or 2 on the red line, but honestly never had the guts to spread while the tourists gawk on.

Blackberry Love

2004-06-02T08:46:00.000-04:00

Reading that article in the Sunday NYT makes me think that Blackberries have jumped the shark. People out here have been hooking up via Blackberry since Clinton. What I do want to know is if I'm the only one “hooking up” with this thing. Dating's nice, fucking's better.
Sent wirelessly via BlackBerry from T-Mobile.

Blackberry Test

2004-06-02T02:11:00.000-04:00

Sweet as Tucker Carlson's ass. Now I can blog on my knees, like all the boys ask.

Even Less Sexy Than DC

2004-06-02T00:58:00.000-04:00

Baltimorienne gets off the ground, and all ready she's telling us about the lack of sex she's getting.

Baltimore is where all the people too ugly for even D.C. go.

Bill Bennett's Dominatrix Speaks

2004-06-02T00:43:00.000-04:00

The muscle-bound babe who allegedly gets paid to beat up Republican morality hit man Bill Bennett confirmed to the Calico Cat blog that the story is true!

Now, for the first time ever published on the internet or anywhere else, I bring to you the actual words of the dominatrix, Leola McConnell.

Leola confirms that Bill Bennett was her client and that she has talked to reporters about it. She says that the story hasn't been published in the media because "right-wing editors" are keeping it hidden. She also says that she is writing a tell-all book.

Jenna Bush Gets Fat

2004-06-02T00:37:00.000-04:00

Just a couple of weeks ago, Jenna Bush was looking like her usual party-hearty self before the graduation she never attended (we hear hangover) but now, while jogging with her gal-pal (shades of Mary Cheney) she looks like Anna Nicole Smith -- before the Trimspa. Nice big tits, though.

Alexandra Polier - Sexy Kerry Intern

2004-06-02T00:18:00.000-04:00

John Kerry didn't fuck Alexandra Polier, but when you look at her picture you kind of wish he had. With a story title "How I Got Smeared" I thought there'd be some hot cum-covered faces in store, but instead we get a dud of a story that doesn't even get into Matt Drudge's obsession with ass sex.

Tipper's Man Gets It On

2004-05-30T01:52:00.000-04:00

Al Gore: boring, loser, milquetoast

But you have to wonder after his recent performances - is the Tennessee Snoozer really an animal in bed? In this picture, for instance, Al seems to be takin' it all the way to Tipper's hole(s):

John Kerry's Snooze of A Sex Scandal

2004-05-30T01:41:00.000-04:00

Gawker has some excerpts of the story revolving around Alexandra Polier, the intern Matt Drudge tried to stick with the rep of Kerry sausage-sucker but turned out to be a dud.

Bill Bennett Likes It Rough

2004-05-30T01:30:00.000-04:00

Republican morality crusader and admitted gambler Bill Bennett is alleged to be a patron of a dominatrix by the name of Mistress Lee. on her website Mistress Lee identifies herself as a "professional bodybuilder" and the pictures seem to confirm a buff bitch in heat.

DC Bloggers Getting Nude For Playboy

2004-05-29T20:55:00.000-04:00

Robert Cox (heh) has the scoop that both Washingtonienne Jessica Cutler and Wonkette Ana Marie Cox will be posing in the buff for Playboy Magazine.

There goes our dream about a Potomac-based "spread" in Hustler's Beaver Hunt.

In Search of Utopia goes trolling for some DC whores (including this skankalicious shot of some babe on a glass table) and finds that Cutler/Cox are way high priced.

The Fuck Train Continues

2004-05-27T00:24:00.000-04:00

Word comes in to CapitolX that a certain "member" of the GOP leadership in the Senate is way into the gentle art of teabagging. Whether he enjoys dissecting cats or not is anyone's guess.

Jessica "Washingtonienne" Cutler: Book Deal, Playboy

2004-05-26T07:52:00.000-04:00

The Post's Reliable Source column reports today that Jessica Cutler is putting together a book proposal, and an offer from Playboy really could be in the offing. Curiously, Cutler told Richard Leiby she found a hundred bucks while talking to him.

No word yet on whether a cock was in her mouth at the time.

(Word is that Cutler may really be 26. Lying? In DC? Nooooo.)

UPDATE: Howard Stern wants in. Three-way?

Catty Time!

2004-05-26T02:09:00.000-04:00

Malkin loves the Dirty Sanchez. You know it.

Notoriously undersexed GOP stormtrooper Michelle Malkin is pissed... pissed! at the capital's ongoing fuck party.

I don't usually write about such inside-the-Beltway gossip, but Cutler's indecent conduct, glib rationalizations and in-your-face shamelessness, and the accompanying feeding frenzy over her, deserve a firm outside-the-Beltway lashing. This vulgar little episode reflects a larger, disturbing media trend toward normalizing and glamorizing sexual promiscuity among young working women. It harms those trying to succeed on their merits in the professional arena.

Think someone's projecting? Hello!!! Malkin's gone a long way since her repressed librarian look, but Ann Coulter is still the queen of the Eva Braun contingent.

That acne will clear up eventually, hon, but until then I hear The Swan 2 is looking for ~~uptight bitches~~ contestants.

So, When Does The Girl-Girl Action Start?

2004-05-26T01:30:00.000-04:00

You can't help but think that Wonkette Ann Marie Cox (porn star name already picked out!) and Washingtonienne Jessica Cutler at least thought about laying down some thick carpet after seeing this shot of DC's new power couple necking...

Daze has some more pictures of Washingtonienne. She's certainly a "mature" 24. When are we gonna get some barely legal action going on here?

Jenna? Barbara Jr.?

DC: Sex Blog Central

2004-05-26T01:20:00.000-04:00

As we all know now, thanks to the Wonkette/Washingtonienne scandal, there is a mountain of sex ongoing in Our Nation's Capital, much of it within the halls of power. And that's just Tom Delay. Capitol X will cover this scene, in all it's gloriously ass-fucking detail.